What is normal!?

When going through a divorce with children in tow, I am finding myself asking more times than not, "Is this normal?". The children's behavior, I mean.

Frankly, the little one seems pretty steady Eddy in the emotions range (besides the normal toddler things). It's the big girl. My already sensitive and high energy child. The child who, tonight, looks out the car window and says, "Who is in heaven right now?". The child when going to bed, puts on such a fight with me, and ends up crying at least two times during the process (and I mean head thrown back in Snoopy Wail form). I am tired, exhausted and, quite frankly anxious myself.

Is this normal behavior for my child? I suddenly find myself daydreaming about all of the other families out there who are quietly tucking their babes in bed as they smile that comforted smile at one another - that last look of, "This is HOME and I am LOVED".

Now, I've had those nights I'm sure, but for the most part it just seems like nighttime is a battle zone and we all end the day in so out of sorts.

Now, the higher self in me knows that yes, we may have some tweaking to do on the bedtime front, but all in all my little babes are screaming with the rest of the families out there. Normal kid stuff.

But, there is that little voice inside, whispering ever so respectfully,

"Are you sure they are really okay? They don't look okay to me."

Let it GO...

Tonight I held my babes' head in my arms, rubbed her hot, wet cheeks and whispered, "Let it go tonight. Stop thinking and let it go...".

And so shall I. A mother's wisdom from within that I can cast upon myself this evening.

Let it go...Let it go...Let it go...